Count your blessings

I cried today.




Not big, gushing, streaming tears that never seem to end, no I was able to hold those back, but a few small ones did get out. To be honest though, had none of them made it past my eyes I would have still had to admit I cried because tears are only the evidence that something emotional has happened on the inside.

Back in late 2002 a young boy about my oldest son's age broke his leg playing a team sport. Not to many weeks later he was going through chemotherapy, then his leg was amputated and then September 12, 2004 he was dead. I grew up with this child's mother and her family. I'm sure we have all known someone who has died from cancer. A very sad and all too common occurrence.

The thing that stands out about this particular case is the fact that his mom started a web page to update his progress. That page ended up being a place where she bared her soul about the love and loss of her son. Over 800,000 people from all over the world has viewed it.

After his death the post become less frequent and today, exactly three years after his death, she announced she was shutting it down. Quite frankly I don't know where she got the strength to do it at all. So she is letting us, her readers, off the hook. No longer will we be able to check the site and see and feel the pain. Pain I know she will carry forever and a day. A kind of pain I hope I never know.

The day after he died I signed his guest book with the following words. It was just one of thousands he received.

For over a year, we have been following the progress of Carter through his web site. At times, we felt a little guilty about intruding on such a very personal situation.

Besides sending our condolences, we would also like to send our appreciation. For we are all better people for having Carters experience shared with us. Every day we checked the web site to hear the latest and every night we prayed. Thanks to your generosity and willingness to share this tragic event with us, we have grown as people. Of course, we cried, a lot, but we were also elated when things went well. We learned what courage was and what hope is. We saw how strong people's faith can be and how much love people have with in them. There were even times when we laughed, like when Carter made the chocolate cake. We felt pride in the way Carter carried himself and in the way his family never failed him. We were able to share all of this from a little boy that most of us had never even met.

Thanks to Carter we now count our blessings a little more often. We hug our family and friends a little tighter. Thanks to Carter, we are reminded that life is a gift to be treasured not to be taken for granted. Carter has touched our lives in a very special way and for that we will always be grateful.

and I am grateful, and that's why I cried.