It MUST be me
The wife went to Mexico and I kept the kids for five days. I worked two half days while they were in school and all day Monday, when I picked the wife up from the airport.
Since I'm not normally home during the day and all weekend I couldn't help seeing the situation as a two fold opportunity. The first and most important, watch the kids, provide for their needs and enjoy the extra time I was spending with them. The second and less important opportunity was accomplishing some projects that I was in the middle of or needed to start.
It all went better than I expected. Besides the great quality bonding time I spent with the kids which included camping out in the new playroom. I got a lot done. I all but finished the new playroom, I did some overdue work in the yard and cleaned the house from top to bottom. Between dropping off, picking up, feeding them, packing lunches, changing diapers, washing clothes, and the extra projects. I was one tired Daddy. Did I have a new appreciation of what the wife does? No, I always knew it was a tough job and admired her for doing it.
Monday morning when I left the house for work I wanted it to be in order. I didn't want the wife to come home to a dirty house and a bunch of chores. There was no laundry, no dishes, no beds to be made, nothing. All she had to do was come home, pick up the kids and know that everything had been handled. She would also be surprised at all the projects I finished.
She was happy at the airport. She had a good time despite some issues that happened with my sister. That's another post. She drove me back to work and headed home. There was no call of surprise when she got home. She did thank me for cleaning up when I called her on my way home from work.
When I got home she informed me she was going to make the kids grilled cheese sandwiches and I could fend for myself for dinner. Not a problem, as I was the one who had not taken anything out. Then I reminded her that our oldest doesn't like grilled cheese anymore but he would be happy with cereal. Then she asked if I would cook the grilled cheese sandwiches? Um, ok I suppose. And she wanted me to make her one too. I started making them but it didn't feel right. She just stayed in the kitchen not really doing anything. As I cooked them she asked when was the last time the kids had a bath. I had bathed them Saturday night. She then asked me if I would jump in the shower and bath them? WTF is going on here?
She just had a five day vacation, came home with more done than she could have ever expected and now she doesn't want to lift a finger. Helloooo vacation is over lady. I didn't say anything other than I would pass on the shower with them and I was shocked that she asked. Again no reaction. I was mighty disappointed. We put the kids to bed, no bath just a wipe down and she went to bed.
I didn't expect a pat on the back for watching MY kids and cleaning MY house. I did expect some acknowledgement of all the extra projects I took on and completed. Her having almost zero reaction is just odd. I'm baffled. I wanted her to go and have a good time. I wanted her to relax and not worry about the kids and the house. I thought that by having everything in order when she came home she would realize I was sincere about wanting her to have a complete break from her life. I could have easily let things pile up so that she would have had to do double duty when she came home. I didn't.
I could have lived with her reaction up until she asked me to cook her dinner and bath the kids. She's not normally like that so I'm thinking I missed something. It's either that or it's just me. It must be me.
16 comments:
You should print this blog out and let her read it.
It's possible that she had something on her mind, and didn't realize how she was responding to you.
Whether or not it's YOUR house and YOUR kids, you still deserve a pat on the back! Getting stuff accomplished is great and it deserves acknowledgment.
I don't know for sure how you two work together, but it might be worth it to tell her how you feel.
*nod*
You deserve for your voice to be heard. ;)
Great pictures of the kids too! :)
I agree that your efforts deserved acknowledgement, not because you did your "duty" but because it's always nice to be recognized for doing more than was necessary. And it seems as though she DID do that by thanking you on the phone.
My guess: she was burned out from traveling. I'm assuming that plane travel was invovled, as well as as a couple of time zone changes over only a few days. This kind of thing is exhausting and very hard on the human body.
Not to mention it sort of sounds like you were trying to pick a fight after you didn't get the reaction that you wanted. That's just my take on it, though. If MSU had told me that he was "shocked that I had asked" him to bathe the kids, I'd have launched into him full-scale. The fact that she didn't just indicates again that she must have been mighty tired.
Jen: No, I don't think I'll be showing her this. :)
She knew how I felt after I declined to give the kids a bath. She did seem to be somewhere else mentally.
Thanks, we had fun sleeping on the floor and staying up late. They think we should do it every weekend.
Daughter: I don't think I was trying to pick a fight, at least not consciously. I skipped the gym to go home and hear about her trip. I was happy she was home and didn't even think about what appreciation I deserved and didn't get until the next day, after it all went down.
I was shocked about the cooking and the bath. Considering I had just worked 10 hours and used my lunch hour to pick her up from the airport and she had just finished a five day vacation and had been home for hours with nothing to do it caught me off guard.
Maybe she was just tired. Like I said, I must have missed something because it didn't make sense to me. It still doesn't. :(
How was your first day back at work? Fun? ;)
Seems strange alright, especially if it is out of character. Maybe she turned into a man hater while she was away?
Darren: Funny, that did actually come up on her trip. A LOT of secrets were revealed on the trip by my sister. I'm still trying to digest them before I post about it.
The wife did get the "Life Styles of the Rich and Famous" treatment while in Mexico. Spa treatments, $45.00 tequila shots, room service whenever she had an urge. She was waited on hand and foot by the hotel staff. Maybe she wasn't ready to give it up when she got home. *shrug*
She was hanging out with your man-hating sister.
:-P
Ha!
We posted that at the same time.
:-P
$45 of shots, or $45 PER shot?!
Off to bed, talk later. :)
*wave*
Or maybe her expectations where raised. You might need to get a bumper pay rise somewhere. :)
$45.00 per shot and she doesn't like shots. She would never waste money like that but the people they were with insisted. Since my sisters company picked up the bill on everything the sky was the limit. They kept laughing at the wife because she was always worried about the cost of things.
Darren: I could work three jobs and not make what these people make. My sister is being groomed to be in some top position. So she is allowed to hang out with the top dogs. The wife said my sisters boss's boss makes about 2 million a year :o
hey :) maybe she was annoyed that you coped so well without her? :)
I love the first picture of the kiddy winks. they look so small in those balloon things.
And is that a pool table I see??? :| Can I move in?
I like grilled cheese sandwiches. You can wait on me for a while if you want.
Helloooo vacation is over lady.
LOLOL! :D
I hope that wasn't it. Keeping things in order for five days is far less a task than doing it everyday for years to come.
Thanks, they were waiting for Daddy to bring in the toys. Those balloon things are bean bags. They dig em. :)
It's a small pool table that flips over to an air hockey table. They always want to play what ever side is down at the moment.
I think I've made it clear, I DON'T COOK! I'll do laundry, clean the bathroom, whatever but no cooking unless someone is going to starve to death. lol
You could just ask her why she was being like that? :)
I did.
"Being like what?"
"I didn't feel like doing it."
"Oh, it bothered you? Sorry."
Those were her responses. The sorry was more of a "sorry you didn't want to do it".
This is strange behavior, but I have some theories:
1: Maybe she was trying to make a point that you should ALWAYS do things like this and she was worried that giving you a lot of positive feedback would make you think it was "special" behavior instead of "expected" behavior. I can't find a way to explain that eloquently (12 hours of studying does that to you), but sometimes people do stuff like that.
2: Maybe she wanted you say "OMG I MISSED YOU SOOO MUCH" but you didn't do that and she was so upest/hurt/annoyed that she unleashed her inner biznatch.
3: The most plausible story: It's not really her, but a cyborg replica, and its creators are still ironing out the "wifely duties" glitch.
Ha! I think 3 is spot on.
I've always heard there is something in the water in Mexico. Maybe she just drank too much *sigh*
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