October 06, 2007

SHHHhhhh



A funny little story that the wife wouldn't want me to share, so lets not tell her.


Last night as I lay sleeping in my nice, warm, comfortable bed I was woken by a the yank of my blanket and the wife shrieking something very loud. From past experience, even in my dazed sleepy state, I knew that the wife was still a sleep.

I couldn't see but I could tell she was standing by the bed pulling the covers off the bed. I didn't hear what she said when she woke me up but I loudly said, "Honey, you're asleep, please wake up." Then she screams, "There's somebody in our bed!" I guess I was still asleep myself because I ran my hand over to her side of the bed to find it touching a warm body.

A little scared I grabbed the body by both arms and held on. The wife was still screaming. Finally I realized one of the boys had climbed into the bed with us. I told the wife it was one of the children but she kept screaming that it wasn't and that somebody was in our bed.

I couldn't see but I asked the child "who are you?" I guess by this point he was scared and decided to play possum and didn't reply. Well this just threw my wife into hysterics. Finally, I half way woke up and realized the wife was standing by the light switch, so yelled for her to turn it on. She flicked it on for a second and I saw that I was holding my four year old down by his arms. The light was only on for a second but the wife must have seen him as well.

I rolled back over with my heart racing. The whole event took all of 20 seconds from beginning to end. The wife climbed back into bed without saying another word. I sat thinking how stupid I was for believing a stranger would crawl into bed with us and just lay there.

Within a few minutes I could tell by the sound of their breathing that the wife and my son had already fallen asleep. On the other hand, I was up for another three hours trying get back to sleep. When we woke in the morning she had a big laugh as I recounted what had happened because, as usual, she didn't remember a thing. I laughed too but damn I'm tired.


5 comments:

Daughter of Night said...

Great post, RT. It resonates with me because it is a perfect example of one of life's weird little events that you were witness to ONLY because you are part of an intimate relationship!

I'm not saying this well, but some people have to go through those weird little events alone, with no witness, with no backup, with no interference or morning laughs.

Bless your wife's warrior spirit for jumping into action!! Good to know... :-)

Jen said...

This is the best!!!
Crazy sleeping family.
*laugh*

I'm gonna reread it cause I can really go for the laughs today.
:-D

David said...

Daughter: I know exactly what you're saying. Although I didn't like the experience at the time, it is one of those moments we will laugh about for years to come.

As far as her jumping into action... umm, I think her game plan is to jump my sleepy ass into a heart attack :|

Jen: Laugh all you want. She has done it before. She once woke me up claiming she saw a man. When I asked her where she pointed at the window. I jumped up and ran around the house franticly looking out all the windows. When I came back to the room the wife was asleep and didn't have a clue what I was talking about. It scared the shit out of me.

Jen said...

I don't know if I get THAT bad. I talk in my sleep too though, so I can find this funny.

When Mike was little he use to sleep walk. With his eyes open. And he'd groan.
It was a lot like living with a zombie for a while.
I sleep in the nude generally, but I had to sleep with clothes on including socks, for a LONG time. I was afraid I'd have to make a jump out a window on short notice!

Sorry I laughed though.
I just LOVE reading your stories. Sometimes they're exactly what I need.

Time Traveller said...

AHAHAHAHA! A couple of my exes have sleep talked. Very funny - you can ask them anything and they will answer ;)